Why You Need to Start Putting Yourself First, and How to Do It
As you start to listen for your intuition, it can feel overwhelming at first. Your senses become more aware and heightened and you start to notice all of the different feelings, and even twinges, in your body.
We’ve spoken before about how to tell the difference between these feelings, and to make sure that the messages you receive are from your intuition and not your fear.
As your awareness grows, it’s good to remind yourself that this is a practice, and with practice everything becomes easier.
I often think about when I first learnt to drive a car (a manual one). To start with, trying to find the gears was clunky. I’d look to see where the gear stick was, and I’d have to consciously remember where the indicator was to make sure I didn’t turn the windscreen wipers on by mistake….
But very quickly, it all became very normal, and I didn’t need to look where things were. I just knew.
The same is true with your intuition, at first it might seem clunky, and considered, but very quickly, you just know.
To help you step into the energy of ‘just knowing’, it’s important that you can fill yourself up with your essence, so that you know what’s yours, and what’s not; what feelings, dreams and desires are yours, and what you’ve ‘absorbed’ from the people and the world around you.
Being a British woman, I love to say the following, as it’s most definitely not what most of us have been taught here in the UK, and that’s:
YOU NEED TO BE FULL OF YOURSELF
No doubt some of the people who read that reacted and judged it.
Of course they did.
And yet, any discomfort aside, you do need to give yourself permission to become full of yourself.
To give yourself permission to take up space with ALL of you; your thoughts, feelings, dreams, desires, and your physicality.
We’re conditioned to in the UK; not getting too big for our boots, in the US; not to get too big for your britches, and Australia they have tall poppy syndrome. No doubt every country has something similar.
All of these sayings and beliefs are there to encourage people to play small, be accommodating, and be selfless.
‘Selfless’. Selfless is made to sound virtuous… but really ‘self-less’… why on earth is it celebrated to be without your self?
When surely it’s the very act of being your-self, your whole self, that makes you the incredible person that you are, the incredible, fully-expressed person you have the potential to be?
Now being full of yourself, doesn’t mean that you become a horrible person and never care about anyone ever again.
But it does mean that you become discerning about your own needs, and how you use your time, energy, and resources.
It does mean that you get used to prioritising your needs, over the needs, and comfort, of other people. Of course, there will be compromises, and times where you do put others first, but these become the conscious choice; the exception, and not the expectation.
Another reason it’s soooo important to be FULL OF YOURSELF, is from an energetic perspective.
I’ve spent the last 20+ years working with the energy therapy, Kinesiology.
I’ve worked with 1000’s and 1000’s of clients, mainly women, and without question, there’s a pattern.
The women who don’t believe in themselves, or who don’t trust themselves, or don’t know what they truly want from life, or have lost connection with their dreams, desires, and inner power, the women who aren’t full of their own essence, are full of other people’s judgments and expectations.
And yes, that’s as horrid as it sounds!
When you aren’t full of your own hopes and dreams, there’s space in your body and energy, for you to hold the energetic judgements and expectations of others.
This then muddies the waters of what you do want, as it gets blurred by the energy and desires of other people.
If you’ve ever made a decision, and then ended up doubting yourself and not taking action, your own clarity has been muddied by the energy of other people.
For you to be focused, aligned, and on-purpose, and for you to be able to hear your intuition with clarity and confidence, it’s essential that you become full of yourself, and not a shell of a person, trying to live up to everyone else’s expectations.
Think about where you might not be showing up fully in your life.
Are there any places in your life where you play small to make other people feel more comfortable, or to avoid being judged?
Although you may not become ‘full of yourself’ overnight, you will start to notice where you aren’t full of your own hopes, dreams and desires, and that’s a powerful start. Because, once you notice, you start to unravel those old stories and patterns, creating the space to re-write your own stories and consciously choose how you respond to life, rather than react.
You create the space to be able to hear your intuition so that you can make choices that are right for you, rather than choices that harm you.
