Are you ready to Ditch the Doubt?

Are you ready to Ditch the Doubt?

So many of the clients I work with find it hard to make clear, confident decisions and then stand behind them.

Some of them struggle to decide on anything in the first place.

What if they get it wrong? What if they forget to consider something important? What if, regardless of what they decide, they end up hurting or upsetting someone they care about?

So they sit on the fence and end up making the decision not to decide.

Others make a choice and feel good about it in the moment.

But as the day goes on, they begin to doubt themselves. Was that really what they wanted? Was it honestly realistic? Perhaps they should have chosen a better option?

That’s when they start asking themselves:

  • Is this really the right choice for me?
  • What will XYZ think of that choice?
  • Can I really do that?
  • Isn’t that a bit out of reach for me?
  • Am I qualified enough / intelligent enough / rich enough / old enough / young enough / thin enough / funny enough / serious enough?
  • When I tried that in the past, it didn’t work. Am I stupid for thinking it will work this time?
  • Am I just setting myself up to fail?
  • Should I ask a few people and see what they think?

Or perhaps they’re confident in their decision until they speak to a friend or family member who immediately makes them wonder what on earth they were thinking.

So if decision-making isn’t your strong suit, you’re not alone, and help is here!

Let me introduce my latest book:

Ditch the Doubt – The Modern Witch Way to create clarity and feel great about your decisions… every time!

Ditch the Doubt

Available on Amazon

With today’s Full Moon energy in Virgo, get the perfect systems and structure in place as you once and for all Ditch the Doubt!

Once you get your copy of the book, you’ll get exclusive access to live walk-throughs of the processes I share in the book, as well as access to a member only podcast!

We’ll have you ditching the doubt in no time!

I hope you love this as much as I do!

 

The Sacred Pause: How to navigate the year ahead, no matter what happens

The Sacred Pause: How to navigate the year ahead, no matter what happens

14 The Sacred Pause - how to navigate the year ahead no atter what happens blog

My daily practices kept me sane last year

2020 was, without a doubt, an unprecedented year. And yes, I’ve heard it called many things, but I think I’ll stick with ‘unprecedented’.

It was a year that forced many people to assess (or re-assess) their priorities.

And whilst 2020 was an extreme example of how to cope with, and navigate, change, it did remind me of the importance of having a daily practice to keep me from getting lost in a sea of overwhelm or despair.

No matter what goes on in my life or the world around me, my daily practices give me space. They allow me to take a pause, come back to my own centre and respond from a place of greater inner calm.

Do I always manage this kind of calm response?

No, of course not! I’m human.

But do I feel better for knowing that I can turn to my practice in times of overwhelm or confusion and it will give me a moment of inner calm, so I can choose how to respond to a situation, instead of reacting in the heat of the moment. Absolutely!

 

The idea of a Sacred Pause isn’t new

People used to find their moments of pause and solace in religious practices and rites of passage. But today, many of us have turned away from traditional religious practices.

We’ve turned away from outdated models of worship, and from an absolute, dualistic focus on right and wrong or good and bad. We’ve also turned away from paths with very dogmatic views of the world that have little room for nuance, tolerance and change.

But once we stepped away from religion, we didn’t replace the practices that once had value and offered meaning to our lives with anything else.

As a result, so many of us feel spiritually ‘empty’. We lack a certain sense of community and connection that leaves us searching for meaning elsewhere, without really knowing what we’re looking for.

Historically, when communities were hit by tragedy or anguish, they’d have a place to come together. They had a practice they could share, be that praying, lighting candles or just being together as part of a congregation in a place of worship.

Of course, 2020 removed that option for the few people who do follow those religious practices. Still, they could carry out their practices at home, knowing that others were doing the same. They could still feel that sense of community and connection.

Most of us who’ve left religion behind, however, no longer have a practice to turn to when times are challenging. We’re left feeling alone, buffeted by events and feelings, not knowing how to come back to our centre and find a place of calm and clarity.

 

You don’t need religion to take a Sacred Pause

If you’re one of those people, I’d like to share one of my own practices with you. I hope that it helps you find a moment of calm within you, no matter what’s going on in your life or the world around you.

I hope it helps you come back to your centre and find a moment to pause, catch your breath and breathe again.

I call this practice the Sacred Pause.

I first heard the term ‘sacred pause’ from Molly Remer. And as soon as I heard those words, they gave me a sense of calm.

A sacred pause.

In a world that’s getting busier and louder, with ever-increasing distractions, the words reminded me that my life was indeed missing a pause of any kind. And it was definitely void of any kind of sacredness.

I’d turned away from any religious practices when I was a teenager.

My family wasn’t particularly religious, and I remember feeling very sceptical about religion as a teenager.

I sometimes went to Catholic Mass with a friend, and I used to get annoyed by all the ‘asking for forgiveness’ that seemed to go on during the service. On more than one occasion, I thought to myself that I didn’t want forgiveness, and how dare they assume that I’d done something wrong?!

Other than that, my mum only ever took us to church twice in my childhood for any regular length of time. The first time was when she got divorced. The second was when she got re-married – we went to church so that she could have a church service to get married a second time. In fact, it was really just a blessing disguised as a wedding, which seemed like cherry-picking that, again, annoyed my angsty teenage self.

And whilst I like the idea today of being able to find comfort in religion, I don’t like hypocrisy that we see in so many people who claim to be religious.

So I’ve made sure that the practice I want to share can be done by anyone of any religion or faith (or of none at all).

It’s a practice that you can make your own, so you have something to turn to when you need to come back to centre and feel connected. A practice that you can use when the world around you doesn’t make sense, and you want to connect with something that can bring you purpose and meaning.

 

Want to know more about the Sacred Pause?

Click here to get access to a video walk through of this practice for the Sacred Pause.

Take 15 minutes to join me, as you re-group your energy, come back to centre, and leave feeling, refreshed, aligned, and more yourself once more.

 

PRACTICAL AND MAGICAL

I’ve put together a collection of energy-clearing meditations to support you with the ART of being more you!

These meditations bring together my 20 years of experience working as a transformations kinesiologist and my love of all things practical. They are around 8-10 minutes long and filled with energy clearings so that you can release old patterns that no longer serve you.

I wanted to make these super accessible and have made them Pay What You Can (click here to learn my selfish reason they’re pay what you can).

14 The Sacred Pause - how to navigate the year ahead no atter what happens pinterest
How to Remember Your Magic

How to Remember Your Magic

You are the magic.

 

There is no-one in the world like you.

 

No-one with your thoughts, your experiences, or your ideas and dreams.

 

There is no-one who sees the world exactly as you do, and that is your magic.

 

It’s easy to forget this magic and this unique essence that you bring to the world, as the world is always telling you who you should be, how you should think, how you should behave, even what you should dream and desire.

 

Society, culture, even your family, can be so adamant at the way it wants you to show up, that you can feel ‘wrong’, disconnected or rejected when you don’t conform.

 

But just like with an English country garden, you don’t tell the daisy off for not being as big as the sunflower.

 

Or demand that the honeysuckle smell like the lavender.

 

Or scowl when the roses bloom different colours.

 

We know that would be madness.

 

The country garden is beautiful because of the rich variety of shapes, colours, sizes, and fragrances.

 

Nothing is better than the other, they all bring their own beauty and magic.

 

You might prefer the glorious sunflower, but that doesn’t make the daisy wrong, bad or misguided.

 

That’s just your personal preference.

 

The same is true of life.

 

The world is much richer and more delightful when everyone shows up as their true self, in all their magnificent varieties of beliefs, thoughts, ideas, and passions.

 

You’re not wrong for not being like someone else.

 

You’re certainly not wrong for not conforming to someone else’s idea or how you should look, behave, or think.

 

When you find yourself doubting yourself, comparing yourself to another, or playing small to make other people feel more comfortable, it’s time for you to remember YOUR MAGIC!

 

 

9 Ways to Remember Your Magic

 

1. Notice what lights you up

Pay attention to your energy.
What lights you up; people places, activities. What pulls your energy forward and makes you feel expansive? Do more of those things.

 

2. Become more curious

There’s always more than one way to do things, there’s always more than one reason behind a behaviour. Step out of judgement and become more curious about yourself and the world around you.

 

3. Make the time and space to daydream

Daydreaming isn’t frivolous or wasted time. It’s a time to reconnect to your dreams, to step into a world of infinite possibility. It’s a time to give your intellect a rest, so you can reconnect to wonder and awe once more.

 

4. Listen for the messages

When you pay attention and consciously look for something, you begin to notice more of it (did someone say red cars! Now see how many you spot…), the same is true for your intuitive insight and nudges from the universe. When you start to look and listen for the messages, you begin to notice more of them around you.

 

5. Spend time in nature

When you spend time in nature, not only is it good for you on all levels of your being, but it reconnects you to the natural cycles of life. Especially if you live somewhere that has obvious seasons. It’s easier for you to understand how these natural rhythms of growth, harvest and completion show up in your life too.

 

6. Trust yourself

The more you can reconnect with your truth, the more you can say what you mean and do what you say, you begin to trust yourself more, as you become a person of your word – you become trustworthy. When you trust yourself more, you become less ruled by fear and the judgements of others.

 

7. Do things that bring you joy

Everyday do something that brings you joy. Step into the expansiveness and openness that joy brings you. If you’re stuck for ideas, think back to what your 6, 7, or 8-year old self would’ve delighted in, and then go do that.

 

8. Spend time with people who lift you up

It’s important to spend time with people who get you, who understand you, and who celebrate you for who you are, and not who they want you to be. Feel the love and support of people who encourage you to go after what you want in life, and who will support you through the challenges.

 

9. Commit to being more you

Be more you! What does it mean to be more you? How can you show up and express more of the values and the feelings that you want front and centre of your life? It’s important to be more you, so that you’re clear on who you are and what you want from life, so that you’re more resilient to other people’s judgements and expectations of you. It’s important to be more you, so that you can remember you’re you magic with certainty and clarity!

A FREE GIFT for you:

Receive my ‘Feeling Connected’ Energy Clearing meditation.

Come back to centre and align with your own path in life, so that you can remember your unique blend of magic!

Feel deeply connected to yourself so that you can remember who you were before the world told you who it wanted you to be.

(‘Name a fair price’ of ‘$0’ below and receive the meditation via email from a system called Gumroad. You can even download the Gumroad app and listen to the meditation directly from your phone)
The Sacred Pause

The Sacred Pause

As soon as I heard the term ‘Sacred Pause’, my body recognised it and sighed ‘yes’.

There was almost a relief that came with it.

The Sacred Pause is a term I learnt from Molly Remer, who learnt it from Joanna Powell Colbert and is a central theme in my work.

I loved that there was a phrase that matched the energy I knew was needed and essential to everyone of us.

Being and Brewing

In a world that values doing and achieving, giving yourself time to be and brew, to honour the need of the Sacred Pause can be hard.

Yet the Sacred Pause is at the heart of life.

The Essence of Life

When you breathe, you breathe in, pause, and then breathe out. Without this pause you’d likely faint!

I like to think of it along the lines of walking the labyrinth.

When you walk a labyrinth, you enter with intention, often to seek the answer to a question you hold in your heart.

As you spiral in, you let go and release all of the things that are preventing you from finding the answer you seek.

Then when you get to the centre you pause.

The Sacred Pause.

The Sacred Pause where you allow yourself to assimilate. To allow the answer a chance to come to you. This is where the transformation and inspiration occurs.

Then when you’re ready, you spiral back out of the labyrinth, transformed, a new person, never to be the same again.

The Sacred Pause being quite literally the heart and the centre of this transformation and experience.

And then you really *KNOW*

I often think you know things and then you really *know* things.

I had this experience about the Sacred Pause – although I didn’t have a name for it then, when I started doing Kundalini Yoga.

I’d been dabbling with Yoga for years, and for me it had always had a focus on fitness and flexibility.

I was surprised when I started Kundalini Yoga, as we’d hold a pose, and then rest for longer than we’d held the pose.

Initially I noticed I was frustrated by this. I wanted to stretch and feel like I was ‘doing’ something.

But then I chose to trust the process.

And immediately noticed that in the Pause, in the rest, I could feel my energy releasing and moving around my body.

I started to value the importance of the rest, rather than the doing.

I realised that in the rest we were making the space for the magic to happen.

Ever since then I have honoured the Pause as much as the doing, understanding that both are needed.

To Consciously Pause

I definitely have a tendency to be prone to more doing, but I always ensure that each day I take moment to pause and check in with myself.

To Pause and allow the integration to happen.

To Pause and allow life to come to me.

If you’d like some help to embrace and experience the magic of the Sacred Pause I have a free practice for you, simply CLICK HERE

Is balance really what you need?

Is balance really what you need?

The other day I was chatting to a client about the idea of balance, and I asked her if balance was actually something anyone could realistically attain on a sustainable basis?

I know many people strive for it, but is it truly possible to find that all elusive balance?

The dictionary defines balance as:

‘when there is an even distribution of weight’, ‘when something is steady that it doesn’t fall’.

But surely we desire more for ourselves and our lives, rather than something that doesn’t fall over?

Nature teaches us to dance…

When I have questions about life,  I always look to nature.

And when I thought about balance in nature, I realised it doesn’t really have a balance.

It has two equinoxes a year, when light and dark is balanced, but they only last for a moment…

The rest of the time nature is in a rhythmic dance of light and dark, of growth and decay, of contraction, expansion and ebb and flow.

It works in a rhythmic harmony embracing change, rather than striving for a static balance of of sameness.

 

Finding your own rhythm 

This then got me thinking about harmony.

The dictionary defines harmony as:

‘the quality of forming a pleasing and consistent whole’ and in a ‘state of agreement and accord’.

Perhaps harmony is what we should be aiming for. 

Striving less to not fall over, and aim more for a pleasing life of wholeness, free of unnecessary struggle.

Perhaps we should accept that we might not find balance across all areas of our lives, maybe it’s not even possible… 

But what if we accepted that some parts of our lives need more attention than others, and knowing that those needs and levels of attention change over time.

And that’s okay.

If we can find our own ever-changing rhythmic dance within our own lives, perhaps that’s more pleasurable than striving for something that may not even be possible, or if balance is possible, maybe it’s only sustainable for that short moment of time?

What purpose does this gate serve?

What purpose does this gate serve?

If you go down into the woods today, you’re sure of a big suprise…

…Okay I didn’t come accross a Teddy Bear’s pic-nic, but I wouldn’t have been at all suprised if I had!

Yesterday after my little boy’s swimming lesson, instead of going straight home we decided to go for a walk in the woods.

Where we live we’re lucky enough to be surrounded by beautiful countryside and lots of trees!

Our walk started like this:

We have a lot of native British woodlands where we live, but this particular one is dominated by the tall spindly pines, and surrounded by fields and more forests.

I love how the paths sweep around and you never know what beautiful things you may come across around the next corner. Even though I’ve been here before, nature is always changing, so it always looks so different.

Each time I enter the forest, she always seems to give me what I need.

 

I’m showing you these photos in case you needed a little bit of forest therapy. Breathe in the fresh, damp air of the forest,

Feel the spring in the forest floor beneath your feet.

Inhale the woody-green fragrance of warm pine trees and an abundance of ferns and nettles.

I’m also showing you these photos because of what we came across next… It made me pause for thought:

What a gate taught me about threshold moments

We came across a gate.

That’s right a gate.

A gate with no fence or boundary around it.

Just a gate.

I’m not sure what the purpose of this gate was. But it did remind me of the importance of honouring the thresholds.

This gate made me stop. Pause. And consider my next very literal steps.

I chose to walk through the gate.

I stopped and silently asked for permission to step into this part of the woods.

Permission was granted, and it felt special.

It felt I had entered a different world. I actually looked around as I expected to see unicorns and goblins (she says only half joking… 😉 )

Walking through the gate, honouring the threshold changed how I felt. It changed how I experienced the moment. It brought me into a deeper presence within myself and my surroundings. It brought greater intention to what I was doing.

I was not just arriving and wandering around admiring the view.

I was present, connected and aware.

Threshold place, spaces and moments are important.

Whether it’s the threshold to your home, or threshold moments in your life.

As a society we have seemed to push thresholds to the bottom of our to-do list, often too busy to notice them.

Your turn…

But right now, take a moment to pause, to take a deep breath and become present.

Let this be a threshold moment.

What are you consciously going to choose to do next.

It may be exactly what you were going to do anyway, but now you can do it a little more intention.