Why You Need to Trust in Yourself to Make the Right Choices

Why You Need to Trust in Yourself to Make the Right Choices

People often feel like they don’t, or can’t, trust themselves.

They seek validation from external sources and can ignore the intuitive nudges from within.

It’s hardly surprising this is the case…

We live in a world that has its ideas on how we should behave, what success looks like, even how we should look.

It’s a world that promotes insecurity; one that plays on the fears of people wanting to fit in, of not wanting to be judged, and all the while wanting to appear successful.

This insecurity can cause people to lie.

People can lie because they don’t want other people to know that they believe something that’s different from popular opinion.

People can lie because they don’t want to appear that they don’t know something, feeling they would look stupid if they didn’t have the answers.

They can lie because they don’t want to admit they’ve made a mistake or done something ‘wrong’, especially when perfection can appear the ultimate goal of society (whatever perfection is).

People can lie because they don’t want to admit to the truth of who they are.

All these lies and deception lead to mistrust.

 

The Merriam-Webster dictionary, defines trust as:

 

a.  assured reliance on the character, ability, strength, or truth of someone or something

b.  one in which confidence is placed

 

It makes total sense that if people continually lie to you, you lose confidence in them, which leads to you not trusting them.

If a person continually gossips about, or speaks negatively about you, you’ll stop trusting them.

If someone continually lets you down, and doesn’t follow through on their promises or arrangements, you’re going to stop trusting them.

Lies and lack of reliability, rightly, lead to mistrust.

This makes absolute sense.

 

Why would you trust someone that lies to you, or lets you down?

It’s harmful, disrespectful, and not nice to be around.

And yet, what we often overlook, is that we lie to ourselves.

And just like with other people, when we lie to ourselves, we stop trusting ourselves too.

When we tell ourselves, and say that we’re going to start that new healthy habit, spend less time scrolling through social media, or we promise ourselves that we’ll go to bed earlier… and then we don’t, we notice.

We notice all the times we lie to ourselves.

We notice when we lie to others, no matter how ‘small’.

We notice when we don’t hold ourselves accountable.

We notice when we let ourselves down and don’t follow through on our plans.

We notice everything!

Even though you think that having another late night, skipping that walk you’d promised yourself, or spending that 10 extra minutes scrolling through social media (that really turns into 60 minutes), really wasn’t that important, it’s hugely significant as you’re telling yourself that you’re not a person of your word, and people who don’t keep their word can’t be trusted.

Ouch!

Of course, you may not be thinking this consciously.

But you do notice and internalise this.

When you start seeking the answers outside of yourself…

When you seek external validation and praise from others…

When you doubt yourself, and want other people to take responsibility for your choices…

You know that part of you doesn’t trust yourself and your own judgment.

To overcome this, you simply need to become a person of your word, especially to yourself.

 

Start doing what you say you will.

If you’ve said you’re going to be in bed by 11pm, make sure you’re in bed.

If you’ve told a friend that you would help them move, make sure you show up.

If you’ve said that this is the year that you prioritise your self-care, make sure it is.

If you think that you can’t do something, don’t say that you will.

Even if that means lowering your expectations of yourself, or thinking that you’ll let other people down.

Instead of going for a run five times a week, commit to one run a week.

Instead of saying you’re never having another late night, commit to going to bed earlier for 1 or 2 nights of the week, or even start with a month.

Instead of saying you’re never eating sugar again, commit to adding more healthy foods to your day.

These may seem like small things, as you’re ‘not really hurting anyone’ when you don’t stick to your new exercise plan, eating plan, or sleep pattern, but there is great truth in the saying ‘how you do one thing, is how you do everything’.

If you lie to yourself about the ‘small’ things, it becomes easier to lie about the ‘big’ things.

But really, it’s the small moment to moment choices and actions that create your day, and these moments create your life.

 

You notice when you lie to yourself and break those promises.

We can think lying to ourselves doesn’t really matter, but what does that say about how much you love and respect yourself?

Because if someone else was treating you with the same flippancy, I’m sure you’d get annoyed.

We can think that lying to other people is the easier option. It can certainly feel like the easier option, especially if you feel you’re going to let them down, or they may judge you. But the ripple effects of the lies, the consequences of lying to yourself, the mistrust you have of yourself is most definitely NOT the easier option in the longer run.

Think about how your life would be different if you had absolute faith in yourself.

If you trusted your inner wisdom.

You knew when to seek external wisdom and experience (NOT validation), and when you could trust your own wisdom.

How liberating would it be to know that you had your own back?

How powerful would you feel if you knew that you were reliable and dependable, for yourself and with others?

What choices would you make differently, if you completely trusted your own intuition and judgment?

 

When you learn to trust yourself, everything changes.

The obstacles and challenges you face become easier to navigate because you believe in yourself.

You trust yourself to make the right choice for yourself.

And you can do it quicker, as you’ve cut out the noise of expectations, and ‘should’s’. Freeing you up to overcome the challenge and move on, rather than getting stuck in feeling powerless, overwhelmed, and confused.

And it all starts when you choose to become a person of your word.

A FREE GIFT for you:

Receive my ‘Feeling Connected’ Energy Clearing meditation.

Come back to centre and align with your own path in life, so that you can remember your unique blend of magic!

Feel deeply connected to yourself so that you can remember who you were before the world told you who it wanted you to be.

(‘Name a fair price’ of ‘$0’ below and receive the meditation via email from a system called Gumroad. You can even download the Gumroad app and listen to the meditation directly from your phone)
YOU ARE The Magic

YOU ARE The Magic

I absolutely love magical tools.

 

I have a particular love of cauldrons… I won’t even admit to how many I have…

 

I’ve made wands, incense fans, and brooms.

 

My favourite tools are the ones I have for divination; Oracle and tarot decks, and I’ve even made my own decks, runes, and Ogham staves, and I have 100’s (and 100’s and 100’s…) of charms for charmcasting.

 

I have crystals and herbs, and oils.

 

I love to use them in my spell work and magic.

 

And yet…

 

You don’t need any of them.

 

The tools are great to have.

 

They’re fun to work with.

 

People often think that they need the tools to do their magical work.

 

But the tools aren’t magic.

YOU are magic.

 

The tools are there to help you connect with and direct your energy in your magical workings, but it’s you who brings the magic.

 

You bring the magic to everything you do and every tool you use.

 

You don’t have magic bestowed upon you.

 

You don’t earn magic.

 

You can’t buy magic.

 

You don’t access magic because you’re using a sacred tool such as the oracle cards, runes, or a wand.

You bring the magic, because you are the magic.

 

The tools, rituals or ceremonies may help you to access your magic, but it’s always there inside of you.

 

Your magic is always present, you just need to dismantle any beliefs or experiences that have hidden or removed you away from this truth.

 

There’s often fear or uncertainty around magic.

 

Misunderstandings about what magic is.

 

People thinking, they have to be born into magic, have a magical lineage, or have special skills.

 

But magic is just the ability to tap into the rhythms that flow around you and within you.

 

Of course, some people may access their magic with greater ease than others, just like some people may naturally connect to their intuition easily, but both are available to everyone.

 

And that’s why magic is a practice… because you need to practice.

 

Practice connecting to your own inner power.

 

Practice trusting your own power.

 

Practice connecting to the world around you.

 

Practicing knowing yourself deeply.

 

Practice connecting to your magic.

 

Practice expressing your magic.

Magic is the ability to change or influence the world around you.

 

Magic is created by accessing, trusting, and using inner power.

 

Magic is a co-creation between you and the world around you.

 

A creation of how you connect with, and work with, the world around you.

 

Your quality of energy and connection to your own inner magic, will influence the quality of energy and magic you bring to, and express, in the world.

 

A ‘so-so’ connection with, belief in, and trust of, your own magic, will inevitably create ‘so-so’ results.

 

A clear and confident connection with your own magic, will create clear and confident results.

 

You have everything within you to create the perfect magic for you.

 

People may have tried to convince you otherwise but it’s simply not true – you are the magic, you bring the magic, and you make magic happen.

 

To access your magic, you don’t need to call yourself a Witch, a Wizard, a Fairy, a Unicorn, or any other title.

 

You don’t need to dance naked under the moonlight, but that is kinda fun!

 

You don’t need to follow a particular path or believe in Goddesses or Gods.

 

You don’t need to be anything other than you.

 

And you don’t need to do anything other than what feels right and aligned for you.

 

Perhaps someone proudly claims the title ‘Witch’, and celebrates every Full Moon, New Moon, and Sabbat.

 

Perhaps the word ‘Witch’ makes someone else squirm, and they have no idea what phase of the moon we’re in, and no idea what a Sabbat is.

 

Neither of these people are better or more magical than the other.

 

Both have access to their magic; all they have to do is claim it.

 

Just like all you have to do is claim yours!

 

You are the magic.

 

Don’t let anyone, ever tell you anything different.

 

Just as Glinda the Good Witch, from The Wizard of Oz, says:

 

“You’ve always had the power my dear, you just had to learn it for yourself.”

A FREE GIFT for you:

Receive my ‘Feeling Connected’ Energy Clearing meditation.

Come back to centre and align with your own path in life, so that you can remember your unique blend of magic!

Feel deeply connected to yourself so that you can remember who you were before the world told you who it wanted you to be.

(‘Name a fair price’ of ‘$0’ below and receive the meditation via email from a system called Gumroad. You can even download the Gumroad app and listen to the meditation directly from your phone)
How to Remember Your Magic

How to Remember Your Magic

You are the magic.

 

There is no-one in the world like you.

 

No-one with your thoughts, your experiences, or your ideas and dreams.

 

There is no-one who sees the world exactly as you do, and that is your magic.

 

It’s easy to forget this magic and this unique essence that you bring to the world, as the world is always telling you who you should be, how you should think, how you should behave, even what you should dream and desire.

 

Society, culture, even your family, can be so adamant at the way it wants you to show up, that you can feel ‘wrong’, disconnected or rejected when you don’t conform.

 

But just like with an English country garden, you don’t tell the daisy off for not being as big as the sunflower.

 

Or demand that the honeysuckle smell like the lavender.

 

Or scowl when the roses bloom different colours.

 

We know that would be madness.

 

The country garden is beautiful because of the rich variety of shapes, colours, sizes, and fragrances.

 

Nothing is better than the other, they all bring their own beauty and magic.

 

You might prefer the glorious sunflower, but that doesn’t make the daisy wrong, bad or misguided.

 

That’s just your personal preference.

 

The same is true of life.

 

The world is much richer and more delightful when everyone shows up as their true self, in all their magnificent varieties of beliefs, thoughts, ideas, and passions.

 

You’re not wrong for not being like someone else.

 

You’re certainly not wrong for not conforming to someone else’s idea or how you should look, behave, or think.

 

When you find yourself doubting yourself, comparing yourself to another, or playing small to make other people feel more comfortable, it’s time for you to remember YOUR MAGIC!

 

 

9 Ways to Remember Your Magic

 

1. Notice what lights you up

Pay attention to your energy.
What lights you up; people places, activities. What pulls your energy forward and makes you feel expansive? Do more of those things.

 

2. Become more curious

There’s always more than one way to do things, there’s always more than one reason behind a behaviour. Step out of judgement and become more curious about yourself and the world around you.

 

3. Make the time and space to daydream

Daydreaming isn’t frivolous or wasted time. It’s a time to reconnect to your dreams, to step into a world of infinite possibility. It’s a time to give your intellect a rest, so you can reconnect to wonder and awe once more.

 

4. Listen for the messages

When you pay attention and consciously look for something, you begin to notice more of it (did someone say red cars! Now see how many you spot…), the same is true for your intuitive insight and nudges from the universe. When you start to look and listen for the messages, you begin to notice more of them around you.

 

5. Spend time in nature

When you spend time in nature, not only is it good for you on all levels of your being, but it reconnects you to the natural cycles of life. Especially if you live somewhere that has obvious seasons. It’s easier for you to understand how these natural rhythms of growth, harvest and completion show up in your life too.

 

6. Trust yourself

The more you can reconnect with your truth, the more you can say what you mean and do what you say, you begin to trust yourself more, as you become a person of your word – you become trustworthy. When you trust yourself more, you become less ruled by fear and the judgements of others.

 

7. Do things that bring you joy

Everyday do something that brings you joy. Step into the expansiveness and openness that joy brings you. If you’re stuck for ideas, think back to what your 6, 7, or 8-year old self would’ve delighted in, and then go do that.

 

8. Spend time with people who lift you up

It’s important to spend time with people who get you, who understand you, and who celebrate you for who you are, and not who they want you to be. Feel the love and support of people who encourage you to go after what you want in life, and who will support you through the challenges.

 

9. Commit to being more you

Be more you! What does it mean to be more you? How can you show up and express more of the values and the feelings that you want front and centre of your life? It’s important to be more you, so that you’re clear on who you are and what you want from life, so that you’re more resilient to other people’s judgements and expectations of you. It’s important to be more you, so that you can remember you’re you magic with certainty and clarity!

A FREE GIFT for you:

Receive my ‘Feeling Connected’ Energy Clearing meditation.

Come back to centre and align with your own path in life, so that you can remember your unique blend of magic!

Feel deeply connected to yourself so that you can remember who you were before the world told you who it wanted you to be.

(‘Name a fair price’ of ‘$0’ below and receive the meditation via email from a system called Gumroad. You can even download the Gumroad app and listen to the meditation directly from your phone)